“Any fool can know. The point is to understand.”
Albert Einstein
One of my favorite quotes is “knowledge, (facts) make you arrogant, but understanding makes you compassionate”. (my paraphrase) Based on this, I am excited about our new projects designed to make life better for women all around!
New resources are coming to Unlocking Secrets for Women! A new e-book and on line video series are in the works. The new ebook series is being written from the large group of excellent authors and experts that have been part of my radio shows and live programs over the many years. The range of topics will provide practical “take away” information on a variety of topics intended to provide expert help for your everyday life! The on line video series will be a series of teachings on a variety of topics, starting with what I call “The Foundation of Belief – Emotional Intelligence”. Both the e-book and on line video series will provide thought provoking mental and emotional exercises designed to make a wonderful difference in your life.
For years I have found myself challenged with the need for emotional growth in myself and the women I have had the privilege of influencing. The sadness and frustration of many good women who have hit a wall in their relationship understanding is staggering and yet the tools have not been that readily available. USFW is committed to providing resources that will fill the gap.
I have noticed that a lot of women believe we are somehow “allowed to behave a certain way, just because we are women”, yet it is defeating and destructive. This has resulted in the potential of women who are amazing, to show up “less” than what we are capable of. A lot of times this has resulted in part by modelling bad behaviour towards our own children. People perish emotionally and sometimes physically when there is a lack of knowledge and then pursuing the understanding. Pursuing the understanding will lead to different “actions” on our part and that means a change in behaviours affecting our relationships.
Over the past 25 years of teaching women, I believe this is clearly the largest gap in women’s growth. I believe the largest influencers in relationships are women, and in theory should mean there should be a ready supply of on hand resources available. Yet I have not found that this is the case. Access to resources for emotional intelligence teaching and modelling should be part of our parenting tool kit. But we can only give out to our kids and families what we know, and if we don’t know this is missing, we keep on struggling. When we really think about it, almost all our problems have a root in emotions. Emotional intelligence therefore, in my opinion, is what is needed on just about every level. The experts that stand with me in my goals have been keen to support this passion of mine to educate us all in emotional intelligence, maturity and growth!
I do not write this as a judgement, but rather from personal experience. I have needed to learn about emotional intelligence over the years and had no one who was emotionally intelligent to teach me. I can remember one day, sitting on my bench in front of an open window filled with fragrant jasmine wafting near me as struggled to deal with my own emotional challenges. I was young, in South Africa really against my own desires and in an unhappy marriage. I was an unhappy self wishing I had a woman mentor to help me. A still small voice came to me saying “why don’t you be that woman”? I remember wondering how on earth could I be that to myself? But I was desperate and so I accepted the challenge. I really didn’t have much choice. All the women I knew, including my precious mom , didn’t know how to help me either, or I would have had all these skills already!
I learned from making countless mistakes that I wish I could take back. The wisdom in me however, knows that if I didn’t make those mistakes, I wouldn’t have learned the lessons I have needed. There are those that have walked on before me that I have gleaned from, but I think the biggest work was in, “telling myself the truth about myself, good and bad” and accepting it without defense. That is the beginning of true growth.
What do you think would happen if we became curious about what was going on around us, rather than judging and labelling our responses or the responses of others? That simple question applies to our own reactions negatively or positively with our qualities and others as well!
So while you wait for the series, start with a desire to be curious. Don’t judge anyone, including yourself. BUT don’t be afraid to ask yourself questions in compassion like “what would be going on inside of someone (me) that would cause that kind of reaction or response?” Just asking those kinds of questions opens the door to Emotional Intelligence! Stay tuned for the upcoming series! 🙂
LJK, (love, joy, kindness)
Candace
